Gerald's grand niece Aron posted on Facebook that Santa had touched her butt. I answered with the following:
In the 1970s, your Uncle Gerald and I were shopping on the 6th floor of Downtown Lazarus and I was dared to sit on Santa's lap.
When I whined to Santa that, "I never did get that electric train I always wanted, and I was always GOOD!" Santa answered, "But you weren't NICE!"
As I arose, that dirty old man pinched my ass!
However, now you know the provenience of Gerald's oft-used remark, which I'm sure you've heard him say: "Sue, you're GOOD; it's too bad you're not NICE!"
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