PORKED UP

Writing the CROWDER BEANS article made me recall that the recipe for Calico Beans came from a carry-in dinner and they were brought by Bob Kelly, one of my fellow supervisors at International Harvester. I had not seen Bob since 1982. Several years ago I was in K-Mart, in London, Ohio, and I saw Bob walking down the aisle. Bob and I were never friends but had worked together in the same department until I was promoted.

As he was coming toward me I noticed that he had gained considerable amount of weight, which admittedly, so had I. Bob was wearing jeans, boots, and a plaid shirt with his belly hanging over his belt; he had a chaw of tobacco in his cheek with the tell-tale, brown spittle around the corners of his mouth. I said, "Hi, Bob", and I was going to mention how I still used his wife's recipe for Calico Beans.



Noticeably moving the chaw of tobacco around in his mouth to be able to speak, he said, "You sure have porked up a lot!" I was so taken aback I could not come back with a fitting rejoinder!

While driving home, I thought of a hundred things I coulda/woulda/shoulda said!