AJAR

Gerald says that my brother and I have "verbal shorthand" and that half the time he doesn't know what we're saying.  We are competitive about word play and one-upsmanship, with our stream-of-consciousness banter.

Yesterday, as my brother was helping bring in bags of groceries from the car, he was trying to carry everything in one trip.  I said, "It's going to take more than one trip." My hands were full as were his.  He was following behind me and he said, "Just push the door;  it's ajar."

The following 10-minute dialogue ensued:

Over my shoulder, I asked, "When is a door not a door?"

He said, "Oh, no, I know that old riddle;  it's when it's A  JAR."

Continuing, into the house, I asked, "But when is a jar not a jar then?"

He asked, "When it's in a JAM?"

I said, "JAM--did you mean JAMB--was that unintended?"

He said, "OMG!  I should have said JELLY;  you're not going to stop now, are you?"

I told him, "That riddle about ajar came from a Fleer's Double Bubble gum wrapper from when I was probably in the fifth grade."

He answered, "I read once that--like you-- Milton Berle also remembered where he stole his jokes!"

I shrieked, "Milton Berle!  You remember Milton Berle?" He answered, "Of course, Uncle Miltie."  I said, "We didn't watch him;  Mother didn't think he was funny."  He replied, "No, she liked Sid Caesar."

I said, "And Imogene Coca;  did you know that our hero Mel Brooks was a writer there?"

He answered,  "Of course;  and how about the movie My Favorite Year?"  I said, "Mel said it was mostly fictional."  He answered, "But it was good;  Richard Benjamin directed it and Peter O'Toole was great playing that Errol Flynn-ish character."  I asked, "Who played the Mel Brooks/Woody Allen-ish character?"  He answered, "Wasn't it Mark-Linn Baker?"  I responded, "Doncha just hate someone hyphenating his name?"  "Oh, yeah, I do, Sue SHIRKEY-Raypole."

Touche!