DILEMMA

We went to a graduation party last night and during the course of the evening I was asked what I was doing now and I told of the various activities I am involved with, including the campaign to repeal SB5. The grandfather of the graduate made the remark, "I don't want any more N...... elected President!" I told the ignoramus, "It's sad that you are so ignorant!" I said, "Gerald, it's time for us to leave!" Another of Gerald's nieces grabbed my arm and said, "She can't help what he said." I was still seething with anger, but I examined my dilemma:

Should I make a scene? NO

Should I continue a dialogue with the racist? NO

Should I stay? YES, because my husband is more important to me than anything and it was his niece's celebration and I should just ignore the ignorance of the grandfather and continue to enjoy the company of ones I appreciate.

In 2008, a niece, her mother, and a great-nephew made racist statements which I could not tolerate. We have had no contact with them since. Another family member asked, "Is politics more important than family?" I said, "No, but conscience and respect are!"

At my cousin's wedding reception, someone made racist remarks about the President and I stood up and shouted, "I LOVE MY PRESIDENT!" My cousin left me off her Christmas card list and did not invite me for Christmas dinner and we have had no contact until recently when she e-mailed me and blithely wrote that she hadn't heard from me lately, but she requested some information that she was unable to obtain elsewhere. I saw no reason to answer the e-mail.

A friend asked, "How is it that you are surrounded by racists?"

When people doubt the existence of racism in our community, I have hundreds of stories to relate. I am constantly alarmed by the racism, intentional and unintentional, that I hear.

A young friend who I truly believe is NOT a racist, made a gross generalization and I commented that the remark was racist and he should not say things like that. He became very upset and denied that he was a racist. I said, "Well, quit making racist remarks!"

My brother tells me I am too sensitive to which I answer, "No, I'm too good a listener!"