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Saturday, May 5, 2018

HEAD GASKETS

At my bridal shower, one of the "games" was to make a bridal gown using tissue paper. The participants could use only paper and pins. It was cute AND humiliating. The bridal bouquet was also tissue paper and someone thought it would have been a cute idea to put inflated condoms to represent flowers in the bouquet.  Fortunately, there were no condoms available.

I said that I had never seen a condom and others were laughing in disbelief when I revealed that fact. The next day at work one of the shower participants told that I had said that I had never seen a condom. The women who had all known me for years had no problem believing me that it was true.

The next day one of the women said at break time, "Close your eyes and hold out your hand; I have a present for you!" When I opened my eyes, there were two packets--one with lime green and the other Tahitian pink--of condoms. I let out a scream and everyone enjoyed the prank.  After the wedding I showed them to Gerald but he refused to "model" them.  Those 47-year-old packets are still in my jewel box.

Before we were married Gerald was working at a second job at my cousin's filling station and one evening a man came in and said, "Hey, buddy, you're out of head gaskets in the men's restroom!" Gerald said, "We don't carry head gaskets." The guy then explained to Gerald that the prophylactic machine in the men's restroom was empty. HEAD GASKETS!  In the intervening years, whenever I have heard the phrase head gaskets I naturally think of Gerald's relating that anecdote.

THURSDAY, AU

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