Saturday, June 26, 2010


We all know people like this: ones who can't stand to have others complimented. These people always respond with negative remarks whenever compliments about others are stated. They act as if hearing compliments about others somehow diminishes them.

My husband's 86-year-old aunt is forever proselytizing with a holier than thou attitude, but lacking a true Christian charitable attitude, she always displays her true, petty self.

Last week, I mentioned to her that I had met a contemporary of hers and I commented, "She's a very pretty lady." The aunt responded immediately, "Well, she MAKES herself that way." Instead of a gracious "Yes, she is", she was compelled to respond in that catty, judgmental manner. Naturally, being the ornery person I am, I kept saying other kind things about the mutual acquaintance. After my complimenting the other woman's singing, piano playing and lovely decor in her home, the aunt replied, "Well, she had definite advantages growing up." MEOW!

But, what did my "egging on" accomplish? It was fun for me to expose the aunt's mean-spirited side, but since I didn't tell her that I knew how mean she is, she probably doesn't realize that she IS mean-spirited. I doubt that introspection is her strong suit. My husband says she's too old to change and that it would be disrespectful of us to correct her. IF she didn't proselytize and present herself as a righteous person, then I would not feel compelled to expose her hypocrisy. For once, I behaved myself and my husband was proud of me because I DID NOT correct her.

My husband told me that I would demonstrate a character flaw in myself if I were to point out the aunt's character flaw. Did I also mention that he is a NICER person than I?

1 comment:

Mona Lisa said...

It's not just catty women; men also have that character flaw. My brother-in-law not only reacts negatively to compliments to others but also never compliments anyone himself.