THE TALKING CENTIPEDE

A single guy decided life would be more fun if he had a pet.

So he went to the pet store and told the owner that he wanted to buy an unusual pet.

After some discussion, he finally bought a talking centipede, which came in a little white box to use for his house.

He took the box back home, found a good spot for the box, and decided he would start off by taking his new pet to the bar with him.

So he asked the centipede in the box, "Would you like to go to the bar with me today? We will have a good time."

But there was no answer from his new pet.

This bothered him a bit, but he waited a few minutes and then asked again, "How about going to the bar with me and have a beer?"

But again, there was no answer from his new friend and pet. So he waited a few minutes more, thinking about the situation.

The guy decided to invite the centipede one last time.

This time heput his face up against the centipede's house and shouted, "Hey, in there! Would you like to go to the bar for a beer?"

This time, a little voice came out of the box, "I heard you the first time!

DAMMIT, I'm putting on my shoes!"